How to Find and Live by Your Values [SOLVED]

Welcome to the first episode of the Solved Podcast. Today, we solve your values.

Over eight years ago, I wrote The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck—a book that, underneath all the swearing and irreverence, was really about one thing: values. What do you care about? What’s actually worth your time, your energy, your life?

So in this kickoff episode of SOLVED, Drew and I are going deep into why your values are the foundation of everything—your happiness, your mental health, your relationships, your sense of meaning—and why so many of us today feel so lost.

We break down the difference between chasing cheap dopamine hits and building real fulfillment, why not all values are created equal, how to figure out what your true values are, how to change your values, how to start living out your values more fully, and how values silently shape your decisions and relationships every day. If you’ve ever felt stuck, directionless, or like you’re living someone else’s life, this episode is the wake-up call you need. It’s time to stop drifting through life and start giving a f*ck about the right things. Forget the rest.

Welcome to SOLVED.

Get the Values companion guide for this episode: https://solvedpodcast.com/values

Ready to stop listening to podcasts and actually start taking action? Join Momentum, a community of like-minded people who are taking small steps every day to make big changes in their lives: https://findmomentum.com

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Chapters
0:00 Welcome to SOLVED
6:53 Episode Roadmap
8:37 CHAPTER 1: What are Values?
9:32 Characteristics of Values
13:29 Values vs. Psychological Needs vs. Preferences
22:11 Schwartz's Values Wheel
29:49 Instrumental and Terminal Values
31:19 Hierarchy of Values
37:38 Values Conflict
41:30 Carol Ryff's Six Dimensions of Psychological Well-being
56:05 Aristotle's Golden Mean as Virtue
1:04:04 CHAPTER 2: Values and Your Relationships
1:13:05 Values and Conflict in Relationships
1:22:09 The Clash of Values in Relationships
1:29:31 Identifying and Navigating Values in Relationships
1:33:40 Understanding Compatibility Through Values
1:36:25 CHAPTER 3: Where Do Values Come From?
1:37:19 Margaret Mead's Cultural Relativism
1:46:55 Mary Douglas's and the Grid-Group Framework
1:55:31 Jonathan Haidt's Moral Foundations Theory
2:08:25 The Allegory of the Taco Truck
2:13:33 CHAPTER 4: Identifying Your Core Values
2:15:56 Thought Experiments to Find Your Values
2:31:14 The Instrumental Value of Golf
2:42:45 The Role of Trauma in Value Change
2:47:49 CHAPTER 5: How to Change Your Values
2:49:39 Kazimierz Dabrowski and Positive Disintegration
3:02:17 On Cults and Cognitive Dissonance
3:15:20 Self-Confrontation and Value Change
3:17:29 Charlie Munger's Maxim: Incentives and Behavior
3:20:50 CHAPTER 6: Lessons and Takeaways
3:20:54 Aristotle's Practical Wisdom
3:35:23 The 80/20 of Values
3:54:49 Reflecting on the Episode